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Male Bashing, Battle of the Sexes,
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Why do little boys whine?
- Because they are practicing to be men.

What do you call a handcuffed man?
- Trustworthy.

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
- You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?
- Because if they all went, it would be Hell.

Why do men like smart women?
- Opposites attract.

How are husbands like lawn mowers?
- They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.

How can you tell when a man is well hung?
- When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.

How do men define a "50/50" relationship?
- We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.

How do men exercise on the beach?
- By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.

How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?
- Make him wear shoes.

How does a man show he's planning for the future?
- He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male?
- All he's concerned with is legs, breasts and thighs.

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
- ONE ....He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.

What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women?
- Exchange him.

What should you give a man who has everything?
- A woman to show him how to work it.

What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship?
- Telling you his real name.

What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
- Put the remote control between his toes.

What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man?
- Big Foot's been spotted several times.

What's the smartest thing a man can say?
- "My wife says..."

Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
- To stop the snoring before it starts.

Why do jocks play on artificial turf?
- To keep them from grazing.

Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
- Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.

Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
- Because not one will stop and ask for directions.

Why does the doctor hit the baby's behind when it is born?
- To knock the balls off the smart ones.

Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
- They all already have boyfriends.

Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
- When the crew gets lost in space, at least the woman will ask for directions.

Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
- When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.

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InspirationalNursing.com:"InspirationalNursing.com. Touching Poems, and Inspiring stories that touch the heart and occasionally bring a tear to your eye. Affection, Ambition, Angels In Our Lives, Animals, Babies, Bereavement, Caring, Caring, Children, Christian Stories, Christmas, Computers & The Internet, Death, Dependability, Determination, Dying, Easter, Emergency Medical Services (EMS), End of Life, Etc., Friendship, God's Creatures, Grief, Holiday Thoughts, Honesty, Hospice Poems, etc."
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Jocularity.com (Former home to the Journal of Nursing Jocularity (JNJ)):"Nursing & Medical Humor. Find hundreds of jokes and links to sites that will make you smile. Therapeutic Humor Associations, Battle of the Sexes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Brain Teasers, Clowning, Clowns, Therapeutic Humor & Comedy Links, Dental Humor, Emergency Department Humor, General Nursing Humor, Geriatrics, Senior Citizen, etc."
http://www.jocularity.com

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Legalnursingconsultant.org:"This website is intended to be a resource for Legal Nurse Consultants, Attorneys looking to use their services, and nurses looking to enter the field of Legal Nurse Consulting. On our site you'll find a directory of LNCs by state and specialty."
http://www.legalnursingconsultant.org

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Nursinga2z.com:"It is our intent for this Alphabetical, A to Z index to be a comprehensive listing (In Progress) of Nursing-related resources on the Internet. It is indexed by Google and fully searchable."
http://www.nursinga2z.com

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Nursingdiabetics.com:"Welcome to NursingDiabetics.com. Here you will find information on all aspects of Diabetes, a disease that afflicts millions of people world wide. I'll be adding pages as fast as I can research the information so remember to bookmark this page and return."
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Nursingdiscussions.com:"This website will be a portal to Nursing Discussion boards throughout the Web. If your site has a discussion board we don't have listed here, please contact us."
http://www.nursingdiscussions.com

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Nursingentrepreneurs.com:"Nationwide Nursing resource to nurse entrepreneurs looking to nework and start home based businesses. On it you will find links to small and large business related resources."
http://www.nursingentrepreneurs.com

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Nursinghumor.com:"Nursing & Medical Humor. Find hundreds of jokes and links to sites that will make you smile. Therapeutic Humor Associations, Battle of the Sexes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Brain Teasers, Clowning, Clowns, Therapeutic Humor & Comedy Links, Dental Humor, Emergency Department Humor, General Nursing Humor, Geriatrics, Senior Citizen, etc."
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The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address of this page is
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Created on August 26, 1999

Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Saturday, October 1, 2011


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